The give and take of cultures

Written by NIGEL RICHARD IMLAY
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Experiencing different cultures makes one appreciative of each one’s unique attraction

MOVING TO DIFFERENT country can be both very exciting, and intimidating at the same time. It was September 2006, and after spending 28 years of my life in India, the move to Australia came as a bittersweet appeal. Thoughts of starting from scratch all over again, leaving your friends and family behind and settling in an entirely new place and culture can be a bit overwhelming. Sure enough, my first year in Australia was challenging.

Finding my first job with no Australian experience, getting to know my surroundings, blending in with a new culture wasn’t easy. The process of turning from a tourist into a local can be difficult for a lot of people, especially if you are not a youngster anymore. I have noticed this with a few families that had immigrated to Australia and then returned to India since the change was too much for them.

I always get asked about racism in Australia. Yes it exists, but I have never experienced it. I also don’t think it is as rampant as the media makes it out to be. Australia is the most multi-cultural country I have seen. You will find people from all walks of life and maybe 50 different countries within a 10 km radius, so racism is not welcome. My advice to people immigrating is to be positive, especially for the first year, after which things start to fall in place.

Looking back, it was the best decision of my life. Gradually, you start to notice the little things, such as drinking water out of any tap in the house, the cleanliness around you and the ease of travelling without getting stuck in traffic all the time, the clean air, and the list goes on. Professionally, I worked my way back up. My wife joined me in Australia after a year, and we managed to purchase our own house (with a mortgage, of course) within two years and we are well on our way to making Perth, Australia, our home.

I made two trips to India during all this time — in 2010 and 2015. The desire of going back is always there, the nostalgia of the city you grew up in, childhood friends and the feeling of being a real local. Once in India, I didn’t realise it would feel this good to speak and understand Hindi. You tend to try and re-live your past experiences in the city you grow up in, visit old hangout places, eat all the Indian food you can get your hands on, and travel to places in India that you never think of when you’re living in the country.

During my first visit in 2010, I remember my friend telling me “Tu angrez ban gaya hai.” (You’ve turned into an Englishman). I remember saying the same thing some time ago to other NRIs, when I was living in India. This is so true, come to you think of it. Things that were completely fine with me just a few years ago now seemed unbearable and I couldn’t help pass comments about the traffic, the honking of cars, the crowds, the pollution and so on. That’s what a few years of living in a Western country subconsciously do to you.

My second trip to India in 2015 was absolutely fabulous. It was one of acceptance and of knowing my roots. We travelled around India and created our own foodie trail in Delhi. The city of Gurgaon was truly impressive. I now sometimes envy my friends in India. One of my best holidays so far!

My connection to Nepal has always been subtle for the first 22 years of my life. Although I have always been classified as an Anglo Indian, my grandmother was a Christian Nepalese from Darjeeling. We never spoke Nepalese growing up, didn’t know anything about the culture and only stuck to eating momos.

It was when I met my wife Anju in 2001, who is Nepalese, that my connections with Nepal would become strong and an everlasting one. I was introduced to the Thakali culture and it impresses you straight away. The respect people give each other, the famous Thakali cuisine, which is Nepal’s best (I recommend stepping into a traditional Thakali restaurant and trying the food), the faith people have in their religion, are indeed cultural traits to cherish and protect. It’s a large but close-knit community and everyone seems to know each other.

For me, being a son-in-law comes with great benefits. Everyone goes out of their way to make sure I am well fed. My three trips to Nepal, the most recent one being in 2015, have been superb. We have already decided that in the coming years, we will spend a month travelling around Nepal, exploring its beautiful mountains.

The recent earthquake in Nepal has been a huge tragedy for a nation that is considered to be one of the poorest in the world. The loss of life and property has been staggering and it sets a nation back 20-30 years, maybe more, to rebuild itself. It is utterly sad to see monuments that were thousands of years old now become rubble — something future generations will get to see only in pictures. These were things that we saw just two months ago. What is heartening is to see Nepal getting a lot of help and aid from around the world. I am proud of one of my classmates, who is at ground zero, helping people in the villages of Nepal. For people who can’t be there physically, help can always be given by donating to the right people who will get the job done. I know that Nepal is land of people with faith and it will rise from the dust.

We have been fortunate, blessed and lucky to be a part of three different cultures. Each one is unique and special in some way and all three countries have a special place in our hearts — India, Nepal and Australia.

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